Imposter Syndrome

Back in 2021, when I was the Writer-in-Residence at the Regina Public Library, I was asked to speak at a writer’s conference.

I remember this because one question was how to deal with imposter syndrome, and I said that I didn’t think I’ve ever had it.

I regret that answer—not because I disagree with it, but because I sounded smug and full of myself.

But the reality is that I lived so long in what could be classified as imposter syndrome, I no longer realize it’s there.

When it comes to writing, doubt and fear are real for me. It got in my way for fifteen years from doing the thing that I love to do.

But after I pushed through it, I immediately started putting myself into new situations in which I’d fail. I started teaching long before I knew what I was talking about, sent out scripts that weren’t ready, and published books that needed another rewrite. But I kept doing it, and eventually, I figured things out.

This blog is another good example of it. All last year, I pretty much failed at what I wanted to do with it. As well, every time I post something on here, I worry about what I’m saying, or whether it makes sense, or if I sound like a person with really dumb ideas. But I keep showing up and doing it—because eventually, I hope to figure things out.

So, when it comes to imposter syndrome, the truth is that I’m just winging it, but I also love that I am. It leads me to try new things because I want to figure out how to do it.

Sure, I’ll doubt myself, but somewhere in the back of my brain, I think I’ll eventually figure things out.

So to the person who asked the question, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound like an asshole. I really regret saying it the way I did. Hopefully, you’ll read this someday, and it provides you a better answer.

Up next 21/ Tiny Notes Listen for the music
Latest posts 23/ Stretched thin and moving forward The Rule of Threes, Conflict, and Starting Your Story 22/ Blogging is my Hobby More than One Want Old Posts Why is this particular character on this journey? Breaking the Website, Breaking the Book You’ll get through it 100 Attempts My March Challenge Becoming a Streamer Make your story (and marketing) rhyme What I want to do around here On Canoeing Reader Error The Continuum of Long Term Listen for the music Imposter Syndrome 21/ Tiny Notes Notes on “The Calculus of Grit” Tea Time Log Jams and the Creativity Faucet Thoughts on edits after the fact Low stakes New site, new changes Story Maps To Kate The Harold 20/ New Directions Stability 250 Words